| About Me |
Name--> NYX Gary
Gender--> Male
D.O.B--> 13.10.1991
Age--> 18
Status--> Attached
Country--> Singapore
School--> ITE CE (Simei)
Class--> UH0901A
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Thursday, December 17, 2009
Maturity & Understanding.
Both of it, is something I use to have pride in because I have them both.
Little did I realise that now, I have actually never did attained both.
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I'm not mature. I can think like an adult and work like one, behave like an adult and live like one, but my mindset is never that of an adult. Because maturity comes from understanding of things & people around you and understanding who you really are - or so this is what I perceived.
That is why I never am mature, because I am never understanding in the first place. Most of the time, I wanted things to go my way. I dont really give a damn about giving you the right reasons or whatsoever, I just want things to work my way because I think & thought it will work. Recently, all my ways seems to 'not work'. And in turn, when I decided to look at things from a bird eye view, I have realised, I've actually hurt a lot of people - especially my dearest girl, Lynn.
Im not understanding just because when people come to me, I hear their problems and offer them advices on what should they do and blah blah blah. No, that dont justify me as understanding. Im just stating the obvious facts that are shrouded when one is in doubt or when one's mind is not clear. And when sometimes, I couldnt remove the fog from the person, I make uses of their religious believe. People with faith tends to absorb deeper by their religious doctrines more than what they do not have faith in. So it's just a matter of how to get words across. So it's not understanding - the true understanding that forms a bond.
Perhaps, the above might/will offend some people. That I do not know. But certainly if you view it in the way I see it, you might find it quite logical. Though Im not saying that it's a correct and absolute way. Just think whichever way you deem fit. Because its your mind, not mine.
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And...
Baby girl, it's all thanks to you.
I realised I have really been unfair to you.
I have always wanted things to go my way with you. I get jealous and angry easily because of my negative thoughts... Most of the time, I always troubled myself indefinitely with these unnecessary thoughts - and this too gets to you most of the time.
To the extent, I keep hurting you - even when you say you are not, I know I have hurt you. I know every time I apologize, you will say it's ok. I want to thank you for being understanding. I want to thank you for always making my day better with your cheery voice. I want to thank you for being by my side till now.
I love you.
And I always do.
And I always do.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
It's ok, I'm fine. I'm going to make it. Don't worry.
Im starting to get use to the lifestyle of working for long hours.
So everything is fine.
Sometimes, I get a little edgy, but do understand that I'm still human. A tired human sometimes do get edgy.
Sometimes, I get a little edgy, but do understand that I'm still human. A tired human sometimes do get edgy.
Im here to post about someone actually.
Someone that I look up to - as a Leader, a Friend, and someone you can really Trust.
He have impacted my life in many ways, taught me many things, and sometimes, help me out of a crossroad in life that I never seem to be able to overcome myself.
And that person is - Acktosh. (real name not included for privacy)
This video basically stole what I want to say, so yup. Go ahead and watch it. It's quite funny - in some sense, actually. :D
Saturday, November 28, 2009
"Honey? Sorry sir, we do not provide honey." - Was the last line I said to a certain customer today.
For that, I receive a good lecture by the dearest customer.
Customer - "No honey? Which restaurant does not provide honey when they serve camomile tea?"
Me - *speechless*
Customer - "Camomile Tea is to be serve with honey so that it will hide it's bitter taste."
Me - "I know that, sir. But I don't think the higher-ups that runs this chain of restaurant knows it, or much less bother about it."
Customer - "I'm saying this just so you know. It will do good that from now on, initiatives is taken by you to ensure the customers receive what they want."
Me - "I understand. I'm terribly sorry about this and I will keep what you said in mind. If there is nothing else, please excuse me."
*smiles and turn around to continue with what I need to do at the opposite table*
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But as I was cleaning up the opposite table, my face changed.
Such Elitist.
HELLO. Read our logo -> QUICK. CASUAL. DINING.
Casual. CASUAL. YOU DUMB ELITIST DOUCHEBAGS. CASUAL!!! NOT FINE DINING. BUT CASUAL!!!!
GAH. *faints*
Apparently, today, I keep getting fucked by customers with nothing better to do but to find trouble with our service here at pastamania. I will state some problems customer I face today and with my past experiences also.
1st customer - Complained that the Alfredo and Supreme Pizza is with ham and they want it WITHOUT ham. When I kindly asked them have they requested the ham to be removed at the counter when they ordered... THEY SAY NO!
Argh.
2nd customer - Request for Ketchup, I say we do not have Ketchup, we only have Pomodoro Sauce, and it's tomato-based and it's something we replace typical ketchup with. They agree to have it, but when I bring it to them, they complained - This is not what I want. I want ketchup.
Pffft.
3rd customer - *the first one I stated*
*getting pissed*
4th customer - Wear so nice, but the aftermath of what they eat... Does not matches the way they should behave.
This is where I goes "Fuck it."
Im just pissed today...
Very pissed.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Update!
So much things happen in so little time.
HSO(Hair Salon Operation) project got shove up my ass and caught me by surprise. The best of all, I have forgotten that this Thursday, there is a phase test - Men's Haircut.
I was in serious trouble.
Mr Lim apparently isn't very happy that I have been skipping school for the past term, and most of it, theory lessons. But I shall prove to him, I can catch up. I guess this might be a time to put what I have learnt during my absence into good use.
Still, making a teacher who expects you to do great things to lose his trust on you is definitely not a good thing. But if you were to see it in my way - It's actually a burden off my shoulders. The formula that leads to my downfall is this:
Stress + Pressure from higher-ups + Expectations = A large decrease in the speed of my ability to absorb and learn things.
But on the brighter side, I manage to find a model.
He is none other than Ong Zi Yang(Seth).
He is none other than Ong Zi Yang(Seth).
After school, I went to Starbucks at West Coast Plaza to slack. I studied a bit while waiting for Seth to arrive. When he arrived, we simply sit down there and talk about stuffs.
I got bored and eventually asked him to pose for me.
I borrowed a pencil from him and started drawing him.
I borrowed a pencil from him and started drawing him.
When Gordon arrive, I did the same thing too.
My phone battery was out, and Gordon is kind enough to let me use his phone. I was anticipating a call - From my baby girl.
And as usual, she did. Though we only manage to chat a bit.
When I reach home, she was waiting for me online. (so good right?)
Chat with her over MSN(finally, its working!) and through Facebook.
And I receive a very special message from her.
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My teacher gave us an essay on love. What is love? Define love. Who to love? Does it last? How do I know that's love? I once read this article on love. It was written by a little girl.
'I know mommy loves daddy because mommy always saves the best piece of chicken for daddy.'
If love is something so simple, why can't we apply it? Why can't we all love? Why does love hurt? Why is it a broken heart can never recover? Or can it? The truth is the world is bitter and cold. Life works that way to strengthen us so that we can fight back, a training for us to withstand the pain.
Love is the start of a new beginning. Why? Like a flower, it blossoms, withers, fades into ashes and gets returned to where it came from. Love is experience and experience is the best teacher. I've had my share of love. Sad to say, I've had a fair share of a broken heart as well as breaking hearts. I guess I'm afraid of love. I fear I may love more than I'm supposed to. I fear I'll have a change of heart. I fear my love will turn into hatred but most of all, I fear the pain and grief that comes with it.
I loved my idol, my best friend. Until I was betrayed and shamed. I loved my first boyfriend. Not realizing how he made love to another. I loved many guys after that. Only to end up crying again and again. By the time everything was over, I gave up on love.
Not long ago, I discovered the true meaning of love. Questions answered and more. What is love? Love is hearing laughter, seeing smiles and having fun being yourself with those who care about you. Love is thinking your heart is dead and something revives it. Love is the ability to share something precious to you. Define love. Love is something inside you, it's always there. Who to love? Love those who are willing to give their lives to protect you. Does it last? It has an expiry date tagged all over it, eternity. How do I know that's love? Simple.
I love you.
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I'm speechless, but happy. Very very very happy.
And I want you to know that I love you too.
So baby girl,
Take my hand, and you shall see Eternity.
Ich Liebe Dich.
Thursday, October 15, 2009
My oh my... Its been so long since I last updated.
*BEWARE, LONG POST DETECTED*
To tell you the truth.
I have gotten lazy when it comes to blogging.
To tell you the truth.
I have gotten lazy when it comes to blogging.
The inspiration to blog just fades every time I log in.
Just a brief update, I guess.
A lot of things happened - Both happy and sad.
Happy events will be such as Jason's Wedding.
Before I go for Jason's and Sheryl's Wedding Dinner, I had to go orchard first. Why?
It was also Greg's birthday!
Meet up with the rest of the sparring group and we took a 15mins walk from Orchard MRT to somewhere near Tanglin mall there. Greg's house is hard to find. -_-"
When we reach, it was an eye opener.
The outside dont really attract my attention, but the inside... Wooooaaaahhh... It's really nice.
Nope, definitely not luxuriously nice, but more to the kind of simple with a pinch of luxury. Most people who attended Greg's birthday celebration are Caucasians, with some Atas. He also turn his birthday celebration into something quite unique.
There is no cake.
There is only Pie. D:
In addition, there are various food there. But certainly not something we see everyday. Salad, some very sour white sauce with cucumber/capsicum inside, and many more. It was nice, but definitely not for singaporean's taste it's your first time trying it. There are many beers and wine, but the good me did not drink them. :)
Why? The answer will unfold, so dont rush. :D
Check the time. It's 6.35pm.
Alright, I gotta go. So I wishes Greg the usual birthday wishes and left.
As I was walking, I am planning in my head:
Alright, I gotta go. So I wishes Greg the usual birthday wishes and left.
As I was walking, I am planning in my head:
Will I be late if I take the train then take the bus?
Looking at the time. I decided it's best to take a Taxi. So I went to Tanglin Mall and waited for a cab at the taxi stand. It didn't take long for one to come by - this area is a rich man's zone after all. :x
What I predicted was correct. I soon got caught up in a traffic jam at Mountbatten Road. If I had taken a bus from Paya Lebar MRT, I will most probably be screwed real bad. Lucky me!
But the jam did affect me. The taxi couldnt move much. We are stop at every traffic lights! Even the taxi driver was agitated. The shortest route was jam-pack with cars and bus, and we only move 4m before the cab have to stop all the time. So the taxi driver and I got real sick and tired of waiting, and we took a longer way instead.
Good thing the traffic aint that bad on the longer route. But the thing is... When I reach...
<_<
>_>
-_-"
Where is everyone? D<
The only people present there are the old folks and Sheryl's side of the family and friends. Where are the rest of the teenagers/young adults that are suppose to here at my table? D<
Haiz, I guess it's the traffic at fault. -_-"
All in all, the dinner was great. But we didn't really receive good service though. The AUNTY that is serving us is really crappy. Do things so rough. Like, how did she expect us drink our wine when she cant even pour properly!? *facepalm*
A few drops of wine went wasted because of her carelessness.
Haiz, even I can do better than this. -_-"
We keep drinking and drinking. Not a chance to rest at all. :(
Both me and Jackson already felt heavy. He had to drink with a lot with my uncle(seeing that he is my cousin's boyfriend), and I had to drink because Aunty Anne wants me to drink with her for not appearing at most of my family's event. *facepalm*
Worse, I dont know why this have to happen, but my dad - who dont drink at all - come over to my table and make everyone drink. Being his son, I have to finish the glass with him. Crap thing is, I just refilled it. *facepalm*
After that, me and Jackson went out to get some fresh air.
Our head seriously hurts and haiz, we just feel so heavy all of a sudden. -_-"
Its a good thing he had the mint sweet 'halls', with him. It helps a lot.
Went back for photo-taking and then realized that, we all, are to go Eski Bar at Clark Quay to drink more. Why? To celebrate the october babies.
Which means - Me, Calista, Cindy-sis, Da-ge.
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Fast forwarding...
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At Eski Bar. Trust me, Im already drunk.
There are times where I go to the toilet with the feeling that im going to puke, but it didnt happen.I keep spamming on ice water trying to stay sober. D<
But never got the chance because we had to drink Green Fairy and Waterfall. *facepalm*
While drinking Green Fairy, I accidentally let the fire 'burn' my throat. The fiery feeling is unforgettable, in a bad way. T.T
After Waterfall, I didnt drink anymore. I just keep spamming on water to stay sober.
After that, quickly went home in a cab with Da-ge and Er-ge. By the time I reach home, I simply change out and collapse to sleep. -_-"
I shall stop here.
Sorry for the abrupt ending but...
I lazy to post on the sad part, so too bad. >D
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Things just went so wrong at the start of the holidays.
Look, yesterday was the start of my holiday and guess what?
I was forced to update to the latest MSN and bingo, most of my important contacts are gone and I cant add them back. Best of all, neither can they add me back.
I was forced to update to the latest MSN and bingo, most of my important contacts are gone and I cant add them back. Best of all, neither can they add me back.
Secondly, with the holidays here and now, there is nothing for me to do.
Running today is impossible now that the reservoir is wet and the sun is never out for the entire day...
My computer ain't for gaming now that it's 7 years old.
Running today is impossible now that the reservoir is wet and the sun is never out for the entire day...
My computer ain't for gaming now that it's 7 years old.
My room light have to go kaboom...
My fastest internet browser, Google Chrome, recently lagged like nobody business and literally forbids me to load pages if it aint loaded within a minute.
All these is shit.
I feel as if I was thrown into D-Day at Normandy with only rubber rounds and dud grenades as weapons.
I feel as if I was thrown into D-Day at Normandy with only rubber rounds and dud grenades as weapons.
Well, I guess I just have to be grateful that at least I have rubber rounds and dud grenades to fool people...
Haiz, but still, if I dont blog about this, this stupid feeling just wont go. Looks like I'm still far from being grateful to things around me. I guess the last thing I can be grateful to will be myself though.
I have promised myself that I will change, so I will.
I have promised myself that I will change, so I will.
All this, is for the greater good.
All this, is for everyone around me.
All this, is for myself...
All this, is for everyone around me.
All this, is for myself...
Change I can!
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On a side note to my friends out there.
What am I to you? Honestly answer me.
What am I to you? Honestly answer me.
If I'm just someone who you come to ONLY when you have a problem or situation in life that you cant get over, please... Don't call me a friend. Call me a consultant instead.
If I'm just someone who you come to ONLY when you want to rant about someone or something that keeps floating around in your mind, please... Don't call me a friend. Call me a thrash can instead.
If I'm just someone who you come to ONLY when all else fails for you and wanted someone that you can punch and wont retaliate to release your anger, please... Don't call me a friend. Call me a punching bag instead.
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Perhaps I say those due to my fatigue.
But yeah, sometimes, despite knowing the reasons...
But yeah, sometimes, despite knowing the reasons...
Or sometimes, despite knowing that I shouldn't expect anything in return...
I still need to rant.
Yeah, I'm just a human after all.
It's hard to walk on the path of heaven...
But nevertheless, I shall keep trying.
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Hey people~
Im back to blogging and this time, it's Yours Truly - Definitely not my shithead of a Sister. :)
These consecutive days of Chalet is taking a toll on me.
Though I feel very tired, I feel as if I can go on - like my energy is limitless.
Let's start on Sunday.
I went to the Chalet at 10++pm!!! Because of work.
When I reach Pasir Ris, I meet up with Hong Wei and we travelled to Downtown East and then to the chalet after we bought our food. :)
Jimmy was playing Metal Slug with his friend! D<
Went to eat our food, with Hong Wei being a smart guy by spilling his own green tea. :D
Eat liao we practically slack. Then obviously, we started drinking. Drink and drink and drink and drink and drink...
I was ok, but was feeling very very hot. Slept throughout the night and woke up in the morning.
Now, Monday.
Went for breakfast at Macdonald. Then, Jimmy have to report back to camp because of some certain incident. Hong Wei went to some OG outing of his... Ian went home and sleep...
Im left to take care of Jimmy's Chalet. -_-"
Literally rotted until Ian arrived.
Watch 'Hangover' with him at the chalet while waiting for the rest.
Watch 'Hangover' with him at the chalet while waiting for the rest.
When its near late evening, I called Acktosh and then quickly get changed to meet them at Changi Airport.
Julia is leaving Singapore.
Went there and literally rotted at Popeye's with them. Dicussed about the AFA competition and plan some stuffs. Then, we see Julia off.
Hohoho, my radar detected some love in the air, so when I turn to look at Acktosh, he is kissing Julia! >D
Muahahaha~! Im one of the lucky few(like only 2 out of 6 people) to catch that moment of ________ (fill in the blank with your own words, I dunno what to put!)
Then, return to the chalet and great, Jimmy aint back from camp yet!
Only Hong Wei is there.
Ian went back home to sleep. -_-"
Then, I went over to Ong's friend's chalet and slack.
Drink red wine and some french liquor/liquier/whatever you spell it as punishment.
Drink red wine and some french liquor/liquier/whatever you spell it as punishment.
Seeing that I come from a family who drink and drink at almost every event possible...
All these are nothing to me. but I still cant drink Vodka, though. :)
When it's getting late, I returned to Jimmy's Chalet and there he was!
Quickly showered and went to sleep.
Now, Tuesday.
Wake up early in the morning and quickly rush to school.
Bloody hell.
There were only 8 people present! D<
There were only 8 people present! D<
Only two have models!
The rest of us do saikang! D<
This is epic. -_-"
Return home and slacked till like a short while then Gordon called. -_-"
Meet him at Eunos and follow him to meet up with his friend.
Hmp, I never thought I will step foot in that area again... Haiz.
In the end, it's just some MLM stuffs he got me into. -_-"
Well, anything, after listening to all these stuffs, I went back to Ong's friend's chalet.
I didnt drink anything. Just go there and slack out.
Overall, I was already tired and really didnt feel like doing anything.
So yeah, I went home.
Thanks for talking to me for the first half of my trip back home, shitty sis. :)
Overall, I was already tired and really didnt feel like doing anything.
So yeah, I went home.
Thanks for talking to me for the first half of my trip back home, shitty sis. :)
And thanks for talking to me for the next half of my trip back home, Lynn. :)
Reached home and immediately collapsed.
Now, Today.
IM SO SCREWED.
IM SO SCREWED.
I WOKE UP AT 12++
*facepalm*
Completely missed my test. -_-"
Im so gonna die.
I can forsee my first 'Love' letter from my teacher le. T.T
Im so gonna die.
I can forsee my first 'Love' letter from my teacher le. T.T